Each is an attempt to talk you out of your feelings:
- I don’t always do that.
- It’s not that bad. (that far, that heavy, that hot, that serious, etc.)
Judging & Labeling You
- You are a cry baby.
- You have a problem.
- You are too sensitive.
- You are over-reacting. You are too thin-skinned.
- You are way too emotional.
- You are an insensitive jerk. .
- You need to get your head examined!
- You are impossible to talk to.
- You are impossible.
- You are hopeless.
Turning Things Around
- You are making a big deal out of nothing.
- You are blowing this way out of proportion.
- You are making a mountain out of a molehill.
Trying to get you to question yourself
- What is your problem?
- What’s wrong with you?
- What’s the matter with you?
- Why can’t you just get over it?
- Why do you always have to ….?
- Is that all you can do, complain?
- Why are you making such a big deal over it?
- What’s wrong with you, can’t you take a joke?
- How can you let a little thing like that bother you?
- Don’t you think you are being a little dramatic?
- Do you really think that crying about it is going to help anything?
Telling You How You “Should” Feel or Act
- You should be excited.
- You should be thrilled.
- You should feel guilty.
- You should feel thankful that…
- You should be happy that ….
- You should be glad that …
- You should just drop it.
- You shouldn’t worry so much.
- You shouldn’t let it bother you.
- You should just forget about it.
- You should feel ashamed of yourself.
- You shouldn’t wear your heart out on your sleeve.
- You shouldn’t say that about your father/mother.
Defending The Other Person
- Maybe they were just having a bad day.
- I am sure she didn’t mean it like that.
- You just took it wrong.
- I am sure she means well.
Negating, Denial & Confusion
- Now you know that isn’t true.
- You don’t mean that. You know you love your baby brother.
- You don’t really mean that. You are just … (in a bad mood today, tired, cranky)
Sarcasm and Mocking
- Oh, you poor thing. Did I hurt your little feelings?
- What did you think? The world was created to serve you?
- What happened to you? Did you get out of the wrong side of bed again?
Laying Guilt Trips
- Don’t you ever think of anyone but yourself?
- What about my feelings?!
- Have you ever stopped to consider my feelings?
Philosophizing Or Clichés
- Time heals all wounds.
- Every cloud has a silver lining.
- Life is full of pain and pleasure.
- In time you will understand this.
- When you are older you will understand
- You are just going through a phase.
- Everything has its reasons.
- Everything is just the way it is supposed to be.
Talking about you when you can hear it
- She is impossible to talk to.
- You can’t say anything to her.
- This is getting really old.
- This is getting really pathetic.
- I am sick of hearing about it.